Writers among us; Poet found his voice through friendships

When words help others, they help the writer as well, By Aimee Henkel Highland Lakes — A few years ago, a married couple came to one of James John Bianco’s book signing events at Annie’s Bookstop in Wantage. Bianco was selling his first book of poetry, “Words from the Heart: Feelings, Thoughts and Memories” and although this wasn’t his first book signing, he wasn’t sure how his poems were being received. That changed when he heard the couple’s story. “This happy couple told me that at one time they were planning on getting a divorce. They had stopped at a coffee shop to talk over the details, who would get what and so forth. Somehow they ended up at Annie’s Bookstop and bought my book. They told me that they read the book together and they loved it. As a result, they decided not to get divorced.” Not every writer can get an endorsement like that one. Bianco was inspired to publish his poetry after spending many years cultivating a “macho” image, he says. He spent his teenage years in a New York City gang and then later became a martial arts instructor, among other jobs. Communicating was not his strong suit. “When I was younger, I had a lot of things to say but I didn’t know how to say them. I thought that men shouldn’t express their feelings and I didn’t care about anyone else. If you were hurt, that was your problem. If you cried, that was your thing.” Learning from others Over the years, Bianco struck up important friendships that would change him forever. In the early 1970s he met songwriter John Denver at an awards ceremony during a poetry festival. They struck up a conversation and became fast friends. They shared a friendship that changed Bianco into a more sensitive, thoughtful man, he says. “I wanted to be like John and I admired him. He was fearless, a test pilot, and he was so free living his life. To me, that was the way someone should live. It seemed like he just loved everyone.” Then, in 1990, Bianco wrote Michael Landon to talk about producing a series of children’s stories he had written. Landon responded and they met in New York for coffee, Bianco says. This would kindle another important friendship. “If you met Mike, you would understand how it was impossible not to want to be like him. When you were around him, you looked at life a different way.” By trying to emulate men he admired, Bianco says he eventually became the kind of man who could express himself freely through poetry. He also became a man he finally liked. “These men helped me to change, to be the kind of man I want to be. I learned that I should open up because it not only helps me, but it helps others, too. I decided to be the kind of person who helps people.” But it took the death of a close friend to help him realize he needed to say what was on his mind before it was too late. “There were things I let pass by, that should have been talked about.” Bianco says that experience spurred him then to begin expressing his thoughts and feelings in poetry. His poems then became a reflection of the important lesson he had learned. “I started really listening to people. It occurred to me that everyone has a story.” Bianco published “Words from the Heart: Feelings, Thoughts and Memories,” through a self-publishing company, Author House. Recently, he finished a CD of readings from the book, with music written by Gary Georgette, a Broadway musician. Both the CD and book are on sale at Annie’s Bookstop in Wantage.